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You Know The Bake Off’s 1 Day Away When…

1.     The apron your Nan gave you starts to make a frequent appearance around the house. “What? This apron? I wear it all the time…”


2.     You eat a biscuit, and find yourself paying special attention to the texture of it in your mouth. Such crunch!

3.     You begin to roll out your best ‘bake speak’ at every opportunity. “You know what this is, underproved” “Talk about a soggy bottom” “Such delicate, pristine sugar work on my cake.”

4.     Somebody in the office says Paul, and you almost choke on a digestive thinking Paul Hollywood is coming in.


5.     You start to attach the word ‘gate’ onto ‘prominent’ life events. Raingate. Latetraingate. WatchingBakeOffsoongate.

6.     You spot a floral bomber jacket in the shops, and think how perfect it would look on Mary.


7.     Every other sentence is now a pun. It’s all or muffin. No bun intended.

8.     You begin to hang bunting around your house, because, well, EVERYBODY LOVES BUNTING. Right?

9.  You specify that from now on, all cups of tea must be served with the largest slab of cake you can find.

10.  You respond to social invitations with “I’m sorry, did you say Wednesday? I’m afraid I’m very busy that night. Very busy.”